Posted by Stef on Aug 15, 2010 in
Date diary - Stephanie 
It’s been a month and a day since you last heard from me. I am hoping that you’ve missed me! With 100 Dates, things have been quite quiet, and when things aren’t working or quiet and I need something done, I end up getting frustrated and doing things myself. This date was one of them. Technically it was an unofficial date, however since it’s a date nonetheless I figured it would be good for you all to read about it. I had a date last night, and this is it’s story…
I first got in touch with Life’s Lens when I saw his profile on a dating site and was extremely intrigued as it was all written in Japanese. I was curious. I had to know why. I messaged him, and then the ball started rolling. I got to write and talk about things that I rarely speak of to any of my friends. Things that have been eating me up inside that he had experience in, and that he could relate to. We ended up after a while chatting on the phone, and they were all very deep, long and thoughtful conversations about life, dreams, and the world. A few days later we had decided to meet up, as in that way it would save both of our wallets with phone bills, and it would be good to talk to each other in person.
Even though I had a big day yesterday doing photoshoots for my upcoming “Where in Melbourne is Carmen Sandiego?” event, and being in the city from 2pm I still agreed to meet Life’s Lens in the city in the evening. I was nervous as hell, I kept asking my friends if it were possible to fake my death so I wouldn’t have to attend. They all just laughed at me and told me, “Yes Stef, just tweet saying, ‘I’m dead.’ then you’ll be right.” Of course, if I tried that, it wouldn’t work. I guess I was just stressed out and nervous. I actually think a lot, and because I think too much sometimes, I end up making situations worse for myself in my head.
I was kept in the company of my lovely friend Lady in Hat to pass the time until Life’s Lens arrived. I felt like a baton or torch that was being passed around, but in a good way! When Lady in Hat met Life’s Lens briefly, and knew I was safe, she finally went home to leave me on my date shouting at me, “I hope you have fun tonight!” then dashing off to the train station.
Throughout the night, my nerves faded into an oblivion. I did notice myself fidgeting a lot, but the more, and more Life’s Lens and I talked, the more comfortable I became. Life’s Lens I’m sure was quite nervous too, but perhaps he had a better way of hiding it compared to Little-Miss-Expressive, me.
Life’s Lens is a very interesting soul. He spoke passionately about his travels, about life, about photography, and of music. I was starting to see a strange pattern. I recalled the lovely Wordsmith from my first date talking about living in Japan for a while. It turns out Life’s Lens did the same, but he lived in Japan for 5 years, and was an event organiser, and DJ by night. These days by day he studies Law at university. It was really refreshing to hear such a driven soul that thrived on aspirations as well. A lot of my concerns, my complaints, and my thoughts that I shared; he understood where I was coming from. One of his comments was that, “It’s never too late to go back to study.” and I really like how he said that. I agree. Maybe I should study something too again? I haven’t been back to study anything since I finished high school. I mean, I did do some Japanese language short courses, but nothing else besides that.
We ate at a Thai restaurant, and I voiced how I was absolutely boring when it comes to food. I am horribly unadventurous, and I can’t cook to save my life. This didn’t bother Life’s Lens in the slightest bit. Whilst we ate, he handed me his DSLR camera to play with since I had stated to him how much I have loved photography, but have never taken a step forward to use and purchase a DSLR even though so many people have encouraged me to do so to nurture my photography. Maybe I should?
After we both had our dinner at the Thai restaurant, we ended up going to a lovely little restaurant-bar that had a Middle Eastern design and feel. At first when he decided to take me to a bar, telling me he’d like to take me to a place I had never been before, I freaked out. Because Life’s Lens is a DJ, I feared he’d throw me into the dark hole of bad dancing, and doof-doof music. But this was not the case. So of course, when I discovered how pleasant this particular restaurant-bar was, I secretly sighed with relief!!
When Life’s Lens described his life in Japan, DJing at the biggest venues, and living the dream, I was surprised and had to ask, “Well then, how come you came back? Why are you here?” He explained to me that he realized he had never done a degree, and wanted to add it to his achievements list. The way that Life’s Lens spoke about his life, about his experiences and his dreams, I was so attentive and could not look away. It’s very rare to meet people who speak so passionately about such things, and yet still can have a level head about the world. I liked that a lot. I could relate with the love for music as I mentioned to him that I enjoyed singing and songwriting, although he never heard me sing at all during the date.
Because Life’s Lens is originally from Adelaide, and lived in Japan for 5 years, he is actually quite a newbie when it comes to Melbourne having only been here for six months. I had to ask, “Have you ever been to the Shrine of Rememberance?” He had no idea what I was talking about, so I decided since he had his DSLR camera to walk on down to the shrine to show him. He asked me a couple of times, “Where are we going!?” But I told him, “Just trust me!” When we reached the shrine, of course Life’s Lens was amazed. I stated to Life’s Lens, “This is one of my most favourite places in the world.” He dropped a comment that, “Okay, so if we get separated like a Hollywood movie, we can always meet back here in a year at midnight.” It was so random and unexpected that I laughed in surprise, and then tried to think of what movie he was referring to. I asked but he told me that it pretty much was every Hollywood movie. {Of course later on on the way home I realised he was describing, “An Affair to Remember” but anyhow…!}
Life’s Lens ended up running around happily snapping photos with his camera whilst I walked around and enjoyed the quiet moments, and the view of Melbourne city. It didn’t bother me that he zig-zagged everywhere taking photos. I was quite happy that he was in his element. I get like that too when something is exciting and inspires me.
I didn’t realize how late it was until I checked the time. It was 11:30pm when I finally checked my phone, and I had been in the city since 2pm. I was exhausted. I told Life’s Lens that it was time for me to head home. I checked for the next two trains, and stated that I wouldn’t mind catching the second one. But whilst we left and were walking back from the shrine, he received a phone call from a friend asking to come meet at a bar somewhere. Life’s Lens asked me if I wanted to come, but by that point I felt like I was running on emergency power. I was exhausted, and felt it was time for me to head home. Surprised by my response he said to me, “Don’t think you have to leave or be rushed to go just because I received a telephone call. I can’t really control who calls me!” To be honest, yes I was leaving because of the phone call, but it was also because I had a long day and needed rest. I told him the truth, and I’m glad he didn’t take offense to it.
Life’s Lens ended up walking with me to the train station to send me off. Even though our conversations flowed and were really enthralling, there is never an easy way to say goodbye. Even though I had given Life’s Lens an awkward hug, I could tell that he wanted to speak to me more. I liked how he did most of the talking this time around with my dates. I really dislike having to speak all the time. I may be a woman of many words, but I enjoy listening too. Before I jumped on the train he told me, “It’s funny how we’re both from the same world, organising events, running around doing things, but when we hung out, it was just a nice quiet time. Let me know if ever you want to have a nice conversation and a calm quiet night again, okay? I would like to see you again. It’s really refreshing speaking to someone like you. I still need to get used to your sense of humour though.” In response I replied tapping my chest with my left hand’s knuckles as if to indicate I was real, and not hollow, “I may be little, and a bit strange, but there’s a big heart in here.” before I disappeared from his sight.
I wasn’t even halfway home when I received a text from him saying, “It was good to meet you. I feel I need more time to talk to you though! :p” When I read this text, I laughed aloud on the train back home, as I knew this was the case when I turned around and jumped on my train.
Overall, it was a good night. I was surprised I became so awkward, and fidgeted a lot, but I guess that’s what happens when you think too much, and you leave the date to someone else to take charge of. Besides me taking Life’s Lens to the shrine, I wasn’t really in charge of anything else that night which probably fueled my awkwardness and nervousness. Did you think it sounded like it went well? By the time I got home, I was exhausted, so please forgive me for only writing the day after!!
That’s all from me for now, I hope you enjoyed my entry, and I’m looking forward to my next date. ♥
Posted by Sarah on Aug 5, 2010 in
Events Hi everyone,
We’ve been working behind the scenes on some ideas for helping 100 Dates to grow and matchmake more people, and we’re ready to invite YOU to help us! We’re now on the lookout for a few Melbourne folk who’d like to help!
You’re invited to the first 100 Dates meetup! Come along and meet the founder of 100 Dates, Sarah, find out what our plans are for 100 Dates and how you can help. Please bring along your ideas too!
Date: Thursday, 12 August
Time: 5.30pm
Venue: Rue Bebelon, 267 Little Lonsdale Street (just off Swanston St)
No need to RSVP – just come along, and please pass this on to anyone you think might be interested. 
Tags: meetups, volunteers
Posted by Stef on Jul 14, 2010 in
Date diary - Stephanie
“Come on, Hearts! Give me something to cheer about!”
I first got in touch with Wordsmith after he tweeted me, then gave me his number and we started yacking on the phone for about 45 minutes before arranging to meet up for a nice cup of hot chocolate. At first when I read his message to me on Twitter before calling him, I thought to myself, “YES! This guy is definitely speaking my language!” because although other people’s source of “liquid life” is coffee, mine is definitely hot chocolate. I mean, who doesn’t like chocolate!?
After much tweeting, the hot chocolate date soon evolved and became a soccer game date, not that I was complaining. It just so happens that the night we were meant to meet, there was a match between Melbourne Hearts & Everton. It didn’t take much convincing. Wordsmith was told of the date idea, and the next thing I knew we had tickets and we were going! On the phone and on Twitter countless times, I had joked to Wordsmith that when we’d meet he’d better not ‘eat my soul‘. He promised me that he wouldn’t, but promises don’t really mean anything when you don’t really know the person that they’re coming from… right?
I had no idea that I was meant to attend a work meeting that same evening as my scheduled date. On the day when I was happily minding my own business, my assistant manager dropped the bomb saying that we had a work meeting that evening and I freaked. I knew I would get in trouble one way or a another, but decided that since the tickets had already been bought for the soccer game, that I might as well try to sneak away like a ninja to the date instead. Being very ‘un-ninja-like-ish‘, I went over to my manager and told him that I had a soccer date to attend to, of course he was disappointed in me, but I’ll probably feel the aftermath later.
After we had closed shop, I informed one of my work colleagues that I was not attending the meeting and rushed away over to the train station. I could see that my train only had 2 minutes left to arrive. “Shit!” I thought, but still tried to catch the train anyway. I dashed pass my bewildered friend who worked at the train gates. From a glimpse I could see he was both surprised and upset that I didn’t say hi whilst I made my way down to the train platform.
Thankfully I had caught my train, and an express train as well! After slightly changing my attire on the train {No, I didn’t strip on the train!} I was in the city in no time, and met Wordsmith not long after I had jumped off my train. “It’s so nice to finally meet you!” he had exclaimed to me, and for a second I had wondered to myself, “Why? What was he expecting? He seems awfully relieved…” I smiled, spoke some words back, and walked over the bridge with Wordsmith on our way to the stadium where the soccer match was being held. I guess we were too busy yacking away to even notice the merchandise stand that was on our path before the stadium; a place which we hunted for later when I realised that it was the only place that sold Melbourne Heart supporter scarves. Alas!
When we entered the stadium, I could tell it was clear that Wordsmith had never been to a soccer match before, or seen any sport live for that matter. He didn’t have to tell me he a single thing, I could tell by the way his eyes wandered around the stadium followed by his nervous smile. I liked how Wordsmith was willing all the same to go to a soccer match even though he didn’t know much about the sport. Whenever I’d ask him, “Are you following this?” he’d insist that he knew a bit from playing soccer on the computer games. I recall the people sitting next to Wordsmith glancing over at me strangely as if asking me telepathically, “What the hell is this guy doing here if he doesn’t follow the game?” I replied back silently with my stare thinking, “ME. He is here because of ME. Now stop staring!”
Wordsmith was really quite lovely on our date. He wasn’t intimidating, was kind, quirky, and all smiles. Wordsmith turned out to be a clever young man who buried himself in the ‘publishing scene‘ for most of his days. I admired that. He also informed me that he had been working on a fiction novel. It sparked a common interest in me. I unearthed one of my story plots that I had written 80,000 words for, telling him of my idea and displaying my passion for writing as well. Truthfully, I had wanted in the past to have a fiction novel published one day, but it wasn’t really high on my list of dreams and priorities for me to do. Nevertheless, Wordsmith insisted I continue writing my story someday. Maybe he’s right? Maybe I should.
It was quite strange going to a soccer game as a date. I found myself talking a lot to Wordsmith, but having my eyes focus on the soccer field instead of looking at his face. I admit, this was a combination of focusing on the soccer match that we came to see, as well as being slightly bashful. I wonder if he noticed? I also hope he didn’t think I talked too much because I feel like that I did!
During the game I kept hoping for Melbourne Heart to score whilst often saying, “Come on, Hearts! Give me something to cheer about!” The scores ended up being 0 – 2 to Everton. In tennis “0” is said to be “love“. So I guess, “Love… Hearts?” Yeah, I’m a goose. When Wordsmith and I spoke during the match, our conversations would often continue on to a completely different topic, and then continue again to another story. It became one story, after another, after another and when we realised how far we had gotten with our stories, it took us time to both backtrack and wonder how we got so far with our conversations. Thankfully for me, Wordsmith is clever and has a really good memory.
After the game, we went for a hot chocolate to keep to the offer that Wordsmith originally gave me. I sipped it happily whilst walking around the city with him. I’m glad we decided to walk around instead of taking a train or a tram; walking is one of my favourite past times and it definitely gave us more time to converse with each other. The more and more as the evening went, the more tired I became. I found myself yawning and rubbing my eyes more and more often throughout the night. It wasn’t so bad however, as I recall Wordsmith saying, “Tired is cute!” referring to me.
During our date, I had mentioned to Wordsmith that I didn’t date around a lot, if at all. He had asked me, “Why?” but somehow I avoided the question, definitely not deliberately. Before our date ended, Wordsmith repeated his question asking, “How come you don’t date around a lot?” My only response was, “Because I don’t think anyone would want to date me! I was actually freaking out that nobody would want to apply to see me on 100 Dates!” From Wordsmith‘s reaction, he honestly thought my thoughts were absurd.
Although Wordsmith and I had spent a few hours together, the time passed so quickly. Next thing I knew, I was departing and our date was ending. “I’d like to see you again.” he told me, and kissed me on the cheek before I jumped onto my bus to go home. I peeked through the window as I walked to my seat watching Wordsmith walk away. He didn’t turn his head to look back into the bus windows, and thankfully I was glad that he didn’t catch me staring at him, as that would’ve been weird.
I cradled my hot chocolate in my hands as the bus began to pull away from the city towards home. There I was, sitting on the bus happily with my promised hot chocolate, and with my soul still perfectly intact! I repeated Wordsmith‘s parting words in my head again. “I’d like to see you again.”
When I finally got home, I texted Wordsmith to let him know that I got home safely, and thanked him for the lovely night. He replied me with, “I’m glad you got back home okay! Hope I’ll see you again soon, but now it’s time for us to get some rest!” I couldn’t agree more, and now after finally finishing typing up this entry, I think I shall.
“Goodnight!“
Posted by Sarah on Jun 28, 2010 in
announcements,
contenders
We’re happy to introduce you to our latest 100 dates contender – Stephanie-Krystle Chin! You don’t have to meet Stef for long to be impressed by her bubbly nature and her artistic bent – she’s a singer songwriter whose musical loves range from Queen to Glee.
Stef was nominated for 100 Dates by five of her friends, who’d like to see her enjoy some of the fun & adventure that she enables for other people through her efforts in organising Flash Mob events around Melbourne, under the name ‘Stefasaurus’.
Stef says she puts on Stefasaurus events to make people happy:
“I’m glad I’m not the only one in this world that enjoys random events, group gatherings & dress ups. You’re only as old as you feel. It’s good to know that even in this crazy day & age, with all the horrible things happening in this world with money, power, depression, poverty, war… I would like to think that creating these random events help people forget their problems for a little while & smile. If I have achieved that in any of my random events, then I dare say I’m the luckiest girl in the world. ♥”
When we met Stef, she unselfconsciously serenaded us with a song from Wicked, at a tramstop in the middle of the city. We were completely charmed, and we suspect that if you spend time with her, those kind of moments happen a lot.
We’re on the lookout for 10 dates for Stef – so please read on and see if you know a single guy who’d make a great date for her.
Stef is 25 years old and right now is committed to her art and her dreams! She loves being around artistic people, and enjoys organising events like flashmobs to bring people together so they can share adventures & meet each other.
Stef says she is on the lookout for a guy who shares an interest in creativity, and says he must understand the value of having & pursuing a dream.
If you’d like to know how Stef describes herself, here’s what she wrote in her Twitter profile:
“I’m a SINGER/SONGWRITER/POET/WRITER/PHOTOGRAPHER/FLASHMOB ORGANISER. I ♥ musicals, tennis, soccer, rock, sci-fi/fantasy fiction, lolita fashion, J-pop & GLEE.”
You can read her dating profile over on OK Cupid - Esperlia.
Her Deviantart page is Lilithia.
When Stef asked her friends to put her forward for 100 Dates, five of them obliged. Here’s what they said about her:
Ria said:
Describing Stephanie is like trying to keep waves on a shore. Physically, she’s adorable-she’s Chinese-Filipina and has a great figure. She’s always moving, always planning happy things (she’s the brains/founder-in-general of Stefasaurus productions) and she is a big artist. She writes her own songs and plays the guitar.
I’m recommending her for 100 Dates because she’s such a dreamer who works hard to make others’ dreams come true & it’s time she gets one of her own dreams. 100 Dates will be a great start for her search for ‘the one’.
Jodie said:
Stef is young at heart, outgoing and friendly. She wears her heart on her sleeve and always speaks her mind. She loves being creative and especially enjoys singing and photography. Her hobbies include songwriting, photography, poetry, writing, typography drawing, going to band gigs, musicals & doing some flashmob event management.
Jenny said:
She’s kooky and random and a joy to be around! She loves making friends and meeting people in general. A social butterfly who is a key organiser of Melbourne flashmob events. She’s definitely a fun girl.
Stef’s young at heart but can be stubborn at times! In a lovable way
She just loves to GO and DO. She’s a singer, writer, photographer and poet. The arts is where she’s meant to be!
Stef deserves someone who will make her happy and who will appreciate the love she has to share.
Russell said:
A very particular woman that is vocal about what she wants. Socially drinks, doesn’t smoke and not too fond of pets.
Passionate about her song writing, singing, poetry, writing and photography.
Recently she has started organising large public events for laughs and to bring random people together.
Olivia said:
Socialising, singing, writing songs, musicals, rock, running events, cold/autumn weather, creating things. Full time worker, non-smoker, social drinker only
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- Find out a little more about Stephanie:
Follow her on Twitter: @liIithia
Follow Stephanie’s 100 dates adventures!
Stephanie will be blogging her dating adventures for us, so you can follow her updates right here at 100 dates!
Got a great guy friend to recommend for a date with Stephanie?
Photo credit: Jodie Becker.
Tags: date diary
Posted by Sarah on Jun 26, 2010 in
announcements If it wasn’t for people willling to recommend their friends (or to take a chance on a blind date) – 100 Dates just wouldn’t exist.
The project has been moving slowly, since it’s just something I run in my spare time, and I have been overwhelmed with lots of recommendations which I haven’t been able to act on yet – sorry to those people who haven’t heard back from me yet.
But I have just finished sending out thank you emails to the people who recommended a date, or went on a date, with our recent 100 Dates contender, Lisa. Thank you all.
Posted by Lisa on Jun 23, 2010 in
Date diary - Lisa 
Although I have reported on each of my ten dates, I felt like I should round off the project with a final blog post.
When I started 100 dates my biggest fear about the project was that no one would want to go out with me, and there I’d be, hanging out on the internet with no dates to go on. Seriously. So I was thrilled and relieved when my first date recommendation came through, then the second, then the third, etc etc right up to ten! Ten whole dates. Amazing.
And I was lucky to go on ten dates with ten very nice people. There was no one I dated that I’d never want to see again – sorry, no disasters – even though I mostly wasn’t interested in them romantically. So I would call that a success, even if my facebook status is still listed as ‘single’. Oh, that sounds very final! But there is still some stuff ongoing…
What I loved about doing 100 dates was the unashamed dating. There was no murky is-this-a-coffee-or-is-it-a-date territory: both parties were there to assess potential, to put it bluntly. I liked the lack of ambiguity in that, the formality I guess. That said, I found going on the dates really nerve-wracking! I never really chilled out about that and found my cool.
So what did I get out of 100 dates? It gave me a push to think more deeply about what and who I’m really looking for, romantically, sexually, and any other -lys. It gave me the context to tell people that I’m looking, even if I’m not really sure what I’m looking for yet. It opened up many, many amazing conversations with people about dating and romance. It was interesting.
To be honest, I think I’m still processing the whole experience. The only criticism I got about the project was that my date diary wasn’t very revealing. It was very important to me to be respectful to the people I dated – and there weren’t that many salacious details anyway. But no doubt I will write about it in more detail once I have a bit of distance – so if you’re keen to see how things pan out, drop by my blog or visit me on twitter.
I’m really interested in seeing where this project goes from here and following the exploits of the next daters. If I had a piece of advice to impart it would be this: do the dates quickly! For me it took three months from start to end, but I think short-term, total immersion is the way to go.
The last thing I have to do is thank everyone who has been following and supporting me, and this project and of course the people I dated and those who recommended them to me: you really made my 100 dates experience wonderful, thanks so much for being so awesome!
Lisa x
Posted by Lisa on Jun 22, 2010 in
Date diary - Lisa
“I can imagine BD and Lisa enjoying a game of Scrabble together…”
And thus it was decided: my final date would be a Scrabble date.
I was nominated to bring the board, and I ran a bit late on the night because my Scrabble set is too big to carry on a bike, necessitating a rare tram journey. Luckily I was only going to the next suburb.
We settled by an open fire and had a chat before the board was cracked out. I opened with FRIED (26 points). BD proved himself to have better word knowledge (LAVAGE, ROOD) and I was strong on strategy (triple word score queen). BD lost (194 to my 303) but, gracious in defeat, carried my board to the tram stop and waited with me until my homeward transport arrived.
A note: carrying Scrabble is a good way to meet a blind date. No red roses or awkward approaches necessary.
Posted by Lisa on Jun 13, 2010 in
Date diary - Lisa
For a while BW and I texted instead of met, as I had to put our date on hold while I ran a festival. So I was looking forward to finally meeting him on a rainy Friday night in the city.
We had agreed on a quiet bar but at the last minute directed him to a different bar, where there was a magazine launch party happening. After so many face-to-face dates and a quiet week I was in the mood for something a bit buzzier. This made our date very social, for better or worse: people I knew kept swooping in to say hi and we didn’t get the chance to talk one-on-one that I would have liked. But he’s outgoing and social and managed to hold his own, which was impressive.
When I had to go to a late dinner with friends, I gave him a kiss on the cheek and left him at the party. I later felt bad that I may not have given our date its best chance.
Posted by Lisa on Jun 11, 2010 in
Date diary - Lisa
My eighth date was recommended by a friend I accosted in the street one day (‘do you know any single people? You must!’). She came through with the goods, SM was recommended, and I suggested we meet soon over breakfast.
When I tweeted that I was off on a breakfast date the response was mixed – there was a clear divide between ‘morning date – what kind of hell is that?’ and ‘yeah – cool idea!’. But I like mornings, and I was extremely busy at work that week, and my date was up for it, so why not?
SM and I met at a cute little laneway cafe and had a good morning pow-wow over coffee and crepes. Among getting-to-know-you chitchat we bonded over bunnies and puppies, food love, writing and reading.
And then we wrapped it all up and headed off to our respective places of work. Short, sharp and sweet – tell me what’s not to like about a breakfast date?
Posted by Sarah on Jun 11, 2010 in
Media coverage,
announcements Hello everyone, in case you missed hearing the very cool radio doco on 100 Dates, I thought I’d mention that you can now listen to it on the Radio National website (or read the transcript).
Love in the Cloud – the 100 Dates online dating project
I was interviewed, along with our current contender, Lisa Dempster, and one of the 100 Dates dates, Cam Rogers.
Many thanks to Rose Paton who produced the doco!
Tags: interviews, radio
